I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
