exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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