That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize