I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
