i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Randomize
