we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
