I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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