I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Randomize