I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
