I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize