Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Randomize
