i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
