I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
vagina is talking i cant
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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