the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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