Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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