dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
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