Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
