Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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