i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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