Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
