Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
