He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize