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What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
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