i think i have herpe
just one?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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