I am spending my child support on dildos
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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