the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.