Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne

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  (734): smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne http://tfl.nu/p5m6
  Replies (2) Good night (1134) Bad night (448)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?

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  (617): why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency? http://tfl.nu/lb38
  Replies (35) Good night (3314) Bad night (629)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too

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  (614): Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too http://tfl.nu/p8r6
  Replies (24) Good night (680) Bad night (1999)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!

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  (859): Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi! http://tfl.nu/jfyt
  Replies (23) Good night (6847) Bad night (896)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  Nah. I did too.

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  (978): Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him? (1-978): Nah. I did too. http://tfl.nu/9ism
  Replies (67) Good night (2633) Bad night (4013)
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  (805): View more from California

  we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home

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  (805): we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home http://tfl.nu/wods
  Replies (17) Good night (1021) Bad night (7878)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.

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  (727): Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome. http://tfl.nu/3ucr
  Replies (20) Good night (1974) Bad night (646)
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  (081): View more from

  KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!

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  (081): KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP! http://tfl.nu/zqfd
  Replies (14) Good night (743) Bad night (1290)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.

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  (610): Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school. http://tfl.nu/m6s5
  Replies (8) Good night (2096) Bad night (501)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  am i gonna have visuals on this?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire

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  (949): am i gonna have visuals on this? (414): you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire http://tfl.nu/3sug
  Replies (13) Good night (1687) Bad night (545)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.

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  (443): I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon. http://tfl.nu/q1re
  Replies (4) Good night (1031) Bad night (694)
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  (408): View more from California

  Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?

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  (408): Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection? http://tfl.nu/3s68
  Replies (2) Good night (921) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.

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  (773): Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check. http://tfl.nu/xi8q
  Replies (9) Good night (1824) Bad night (406)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?

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  (613): Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus? http://tfl.nu/amrt
  Replies (4) Good night (294) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.

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  (614): yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner. http://tfl.nu/ta4u
  Replies (1) Good night (623) Bad night (204)

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