let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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