No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Randomize
