Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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