glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Randomize
