If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
