i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
bring money and cleavage
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Randomize
