I'm lost and stupid without you.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
