Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize