that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize