you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
