I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
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