The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I've blown a few things in my day
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
