My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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