marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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