ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize