Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
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