Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
