Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
