Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Naked. naked and bneed help.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
