Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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