OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
