A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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