What a fucking waste of an outfit
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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