The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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