I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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